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Marriage Advice For Feeling More Love
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Monday, July 13, 2009 |
It's no big secret that we all want to be in relationships to feel love. The more we feel, the better. The less we feel, the more troubled our relationship is.
At first, when we get into a relationship, we feel a lot of love. In the first stage of falling in love, we do actually feel a lot of love.
After the initial falling in love phase is over, how we feel loved shifts. Sometimes we feel it, sometimes we don't.
However, there is a way to make each other feel really loved every day. Maybe twice or five times as loved as we normally do. This skill can be called the Love Multiplier.
Feeling much more love in your relationship is not hard. You simply need to discover your structure for feeling loved. You have a structure or personal way for feeling loved. When your partner does this or that you feel loved, when they do other things, you don't.
For example, you are not overwhelmed by feelings of love when a fly buzzes around your ear. When your lover whispers hot nothings into your ear you may feel very loved. The point is that some things make you feel loved, and some do not.
This is an important revelation.
Feelings of love don't just happen to us willy-nilly. Oftentimes, feelings are results, they have causes or "structures." Of all the things your mate does, when you can identify the behaviors that make you feel loved you can start to feel it "on purpose."
Each of us has a personal or idiosyncratic way that we feel love. Some of us feel more loved with visual displays like when our mate wears lingerie or brings us pretty flowers. Others of us feel loved in an auditory way, with the right music or the right tone in a lovers voice. To feel more love, you just need to figure out what things make you feel loved, and what things you do that make your mate feel loved, and start doing those things on purpose.
There is a lot more to figuring out our love buttons, but just this can help you to start bringing more love into your relationship on purpose every day. |
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posted by TINA ALBERT @ 10:58 PM  |
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